I've been reading Myths of Mars and Venus: Do Men and Women Really Speak Different Languages by Deborah Cameron. It raises thought provoking insights and Cameron argues her points mostly through evidence, though she is guilty of illustrating a few points with anecdotes. She notes an all important point -- go back and study work cited directly, whether it's from a book, an article, or TV report.
Interestingly she addresses a claim I had read in several books: That women on average speak far more words than men each day. The book The Female Brain states the daily difference as 20,000 uttered words by women compared to 7,000 by men. A professor of phonetics, a Mark Liberman, found there was no scientific basis for this or any similar claim (19-20).
I would've liked Cameron's book to have been more in depth but it did provide good breadth -- from history (western perspective) of how women and men started to be perceived as communicating differently, to studying male/female differences in various contexts and cultures to alleged explanations of these differences (brain, genetics, evolution). It's a good starting point.
It's limiting to focus on differences between sexes because it breeds expectations that in turn discriminate against what's right for women or men to pursue as a career or path. It also takes away from the influence of culture and context. Much more is at play than simply someone's gender.